Outside my kitchen window, I can see into the garden. Right in front of the window, among the shrubs, in the corner of the flower bed there is a daffodil. Just one single daffodil, right in the corner by the stone edge of the path. I see this daffodil every day, every time I come into the kitchen….and bearing in mind how much coffee I drink, I see it a lot! I’ve watched how it’s grown, from what looked like nothing, an empty patch of dirt, into a bright yellow daffodil, little by little each day. Each time I see it, it reminds me how winter is nearly over and spring is definitely just around the corner, if not already here. If you’ve read my blog Beating the Winter Blues you know that summer is my favourite time of year, so seeing the first blossom of the year and daffodils, always make me smile because it means winter is nearly over.
Anyway, back to the daffodil – so I’ve watched this pretty flower grow and get bigger every day, little by little. Then a couple of weeks or so ago, it was quite windy where I live and I noticed as I looked out the kitchen window the daffodil had been blown over and was on lying on the ground. I was a bit sad by this because I enjoyed seeing it every day, standing tall, it’s bright yellow flower reminding me summer was not far away now. For the first few days, I saw it lying on the floor of the flower bed, looking quite sorry for itself, then one day, I noticed how it was no longer lying on the floor, it had started to pull itself back up. Each day, I watched it pull itself back up, little by little till it was as tall as it had been. I was surprised the daffodil had got back up, it looked quite flimsy and not very resilient at all. But I’m glad to say I was wrong.
I thought I’d share this with you because it made me think; sometimes in life, the “wind” comes along and knocks us down. Things happen which are out of our control but we have a choice of how we react to these things that knock us for six. We can’t always control what happens to us, but we always have a choice as to how we react. Randy Pausch puts it quite well, he said you can’t change the cards you are dealt with, but you can change how you play them.
What do you do, do you choose to get back up or let the thing that knocked you down, keep you down?
We may not always think we have a choice, but we do. In fact, in our everyday life we are making choices, all the time, we just forget to see them that way because they are so familiar to us e.g you choose to get up at the time you do, you choose how you get to work, you choose the job you have and so on. Sometimes we don’t see where the choices lie because it can be daunting – but there is always a choice.
You Always Have A Choice…
When you believe you have no choice you become powerless. Try this: say out loud “I have to go to work” then say “I choose to go to work”. Which one of those two statements feels more empowering?
You may not always feel like you have a choice, but you do. In fact accepting you have a choice, is a choice in itself; you choose to to accept if you have a choice or not!
What do you choose?
So do you choose to accept you always have a choice, that you choose how to play the cards you are given or do you choose that you don’t have a choice, that you have no say in how the cards are to be played?
When you accept you have a choice, you have the power to change things, change your life. Rather than feeling victimised by the things that happen to you, take ownership of the things that happen in your life. After all it is your life.
Read more about Cognitive Hypnotherapy.